Dad's Mind, My Heart

Dad came back Monday from three weeks in Florida. So far, so good. He shares that he feels lost in time and geography—he needs reminders that he lives with me, where his property is, where he stayed recently, and that we have been to the eastern shore to see his old seminary churches and his college in DC.  He doesn't ask for help with bathroom needs - he has 3 disposable urinals in the basement, so he doesn't have to go upstairs all night to pee, but when he couldn't find one, he found some random gallon jug and used that to pee in.  Including him in the morning walks with the dogs is helpful. It starts the day with activity, which helps him stay busy. He loves to say, " I like to stay busy and active." The only issue is that he said his legs felt numb twice yesterday. I'm thankful his leg ultrasound is soon to get that checked out.  An invaluable tool recommended to me by a friend is helping me to feel less overwhelmed, which is great because I've been d...

I was going to share our trip to the Eastern Shore next and include photos because it's chronologically accurate, but I can't today. I just need to get some things off my heart concerning my father's Alzheimer's. I'm sad.  I'm sad for him.  I'm sad for myself.  I'm sad for his friends. I'm sad for my kids.  The past few days he has been really bad for him memory wise. He often thinks he is in Florida. He can't read his handwriting. He wants to be on top of his finances, but can't remember what we covered after 10 minutes. He is getting really anxious, and it presents as "allergies". Yesterday I gave him Sudafed, and then he asked for more allergy medicine, so I gave him a nose spray, and he wanted something else, 20 minutes later, so I gave him his prescription Valium. I encouraged him to wait at least 30 minutes since he just took another "allergy" medicine because he was extremely impatient. 30 min later, he could breath...

 It's been quite a while since I updated the blog. There has been a lot going on.  Dad's trip to Florida was wonderful. Aside from our small argument on his first day there, everything else went smoothly thanks to C. I truly appreciate her. Like I do, she knows that keeping him busy is the key to keeping him happy, and I'm incredibly thankful for everything she included him in while he was there. On April 22nd, C reported that he watered the plants and the grass and was happy. She told him no heavy lifting or strenuous work because he had just had his surgery. He was complaining to her that I worry too much.  I told her that he wasn't allowed to lift anything over 10 lbs and encouraged him to drink more water. I also let her know that if he had shortness of breath, he needed to go immediately to the ER, as that could be his aortic valve needing help. I also let her know that if he does have a UTI or any other type of cold, it would impair his cognition and that before h...

Tuesday morning was a little weird. Dad was up, and I was ready to go, and he asked me what the plans were for the day. I told him he had a flight to catch at 8:30 and he looked down and said, "Do I really need to go on this trip?" I said, "You don't have to, but you've wanted to visit FL for a while now, and C said you could stay with them."  "Oh, alright, since I've paid for the flights and all. Can you help me go over the flight for today and my return?" So, I spent the next 40 minutes simplifying his notes so he knew what to do when he entered the airport and where he was going to be met at the airport in Florida.  I ensured he took his medicine, placed it in his bag, and had some breakfast even if he didn't get to his coffee.  I called him closer to departure time to ensure he was good to go at the gate. He was, and he sounded cheerful, so that made me happy. I was not happy when he called me that evening to tell me he thin...

 Dad's surgery went well. We were sent home the same day. He has his follow-up scheduled for May 2nd. Knowing that he will most likely be having six weeks of treatment after the follow-up, he decided to ask his friend C if he could stay a week with her in Florida. C is a very kind and caring person, but has a hard time saying no. Dad is supposed to fly out next Tuesday and return the following Tuesday. I'm not going with him on this trip. His trip falls during my middle child's thirteenth birthday, and I'm not going to miss it. That said, I'm not excited about the prospect of my father traveling alone, as his memory is only getting worse. For example, I went to the emergency room on Tuesday night. I told him in the afternoon when we woke up because we didn't get home until 3:30 a.m. After I told him this and he asked me a bunch of questions about my symptoms, he asked me to take him to the liquor store. I said, "Sure, just let me finish what I'm doing....

First and foremost, his Alzheimer's symptoms have been progressively getting worse. There are shorter periods of remembering things. He gets stuck believing he lost his baseball cards - they are in his room- he believes he was buried alive at some point in his life - that's news to me as I always thought it was his father. He is also stuck on going to the Eastern Shore to see where he used to preach during his seminary days, thinking it's a super quick drive, but it is not. I'm mapping out a trip, but he doesn't recall it and keeps asking to go this weekend.  Last Sunday he helped out at the community Easter Egg Hunt. It was fun but windy! I'll have to find windproof crafts for next year. My dad really enjoyed his time there. I look forward to sharing more community events with him. My favorite is the Fall Festival, but I think I can get him interested in the pool events even though he is not a pool person.  The kittens have made him happy when he go...