We have arrived! Time to clear out stuff.

We made it to Florida! The ride was pretty bumpy but overall it went well. My father who is an avid traveler forgot to empty his pockets for the TSA screening. It was fine because TSA at BWI this morning was a hot mess. They ran out of containers for people to put their things in. 

We grabbed breakfast and then coffee at Starbucks and sat at our gate. We talked a lot. He had a lot of questions for me such as - where have I been living recently? - did you see the scans of my brain? It's disconcerting that several large areas have shrunk. When do we come back from FL? I am living with you? How long have I been living with you?  On and on for a good hour or more. I was fine and happy to answer his questions. 

We board the plane and he forgot to grab his magazine and glasses so he could read during take off and stabilization. Eventually he was able to grab them from his carryon. I was able to get through several chapters of my book. I think I napped the last 30 minutes of the flight. We were up at 4:30 am. 

We land and get the rental car (basically the hybrid of what I drive currently and without the cool seating option, only heated seats) and we go have lunch. Then we go to the house and he is pleasantly surprised that we have so much food and drinks already there. I strip the king bed we share when he does come up to sleep. I start washing them and he spends two hours outside watering the plants and then takes Dawn dish soap and splatters it all over his patio and then sweeps it. I keep asking him to drink water and he won't. He at least grabbed an non alcoholic beer to drink. His friend L came over and I was very happy to see her. She encouraged him to spray the soap out so her and I could talk. 

I let her know that He didn't remember our flight to FL. That he told me he doesn't want to stay in house because it's dark and depressing. Later I found out he was worried I was going to make him live alone in his condo. I reassured him that he lives with me now in MD. That we are only here to go through things to see if we will keep it in storage or sell it at the antique store. After she left my I'm came by to talk to me because my nephew has the flu. 

I told mom about everything and she was supportive.  When she left, my father was filled with anxiety. So we took a walk, saw my sister, and then walked some more with more reminders and reassurances that I will not leave him here by himself that he will come home with me when we are done. He is still not calmed down and we are several hours in. I don't know really what to do to redirect him as I have one of his favorite shows on and I made the bed - just waiting on the comforter to be done in the dryer. 

He found papers he left here and is going through them. He just said that he hates when he does these lists and doesn't put a year date on them. This is why I'm asking his friends to take him out so I can go through paperwork that he doesn't need to keep. I'm serious, he has papers from the 70's that he still has filed. I do want to keep him involved and I will as much as I can do long as we don't go on 500 side quests. 

It's so hard seeing him struggle but he did tell me today that I'm his anchor and I'm thankful I can be that for him. I just hope things go well in the next few days and we can get things done so I can be home Valentine's evening. I am really unsure how tonight will go. Hopefully he will sleep ok and not want to get a hotel in the middle of the night. I'm not sure I could handle that as tired as I already am. 

I love him and I know I'm doing my best while also taking care of myself. I'm really happy I've been good with noticing stress in my body. It's helped a lot and I know that whatever happens I can handle it with compassion and love.